I EAT POOP

Today I woke up and had a nice piece of poop for breakfast, just like Shooter McGavin from Happy Gilmore likes to do. The poop was so warm this morning, I just love how it melts in my mouth and slowly spreads between all my teeth and gets stuck to the roof of my mouth. I love eating poop so much. There are so many ways you can make poop. You can stir fry it, boil it, grill it, eat it raw, deep fry it, make baked stuffed poop, fried poop Sicilian and Greek style, jolly poop, marinated poop, poop stew, poop jambalaya, poop pilaf, poop salad rings, poopchalata, hot chunky poop pudding, Moose Mousse, Poopsicles, Crappe Frappe nutty pop with corn, Taco Bell’s Bean Burrito, shitake mushrooms, poop sweet and sour style, tangy poop salad, poop casserole, poop spaghetti, poop tacos, poop pizza, poop tortillas, chopped poop sui, poop salad, chicken fried poop, poop dog, poop burger, poop split, poop sundae, poop cream, poop squishy, poop soda, poop beer, and many many more varieties of ways to crate a delicious meal with poop as the main ingredient. All these varieties taste so delicious and are a blast to make!
Poop tastes so good that many restaurants use it as a staple in pleasing their customers. In today's fast food industry the most well known food item made from poop is Taco Bell's bean burrito. Taco Bell states that all of their bean burritos must contain at least 51% poop if they are to be sold to the public. (The remaining 49% of the burrito is made up of a variety of filler items including pinto beans, onions, guar gum, and mouse fur). Interestingly, one of Taco Bell's first mass promotional campaigns involved giving any customer who pulled up to the drive-thru in a crapmobile a free bean burrito. For more facts like the one you just read about Tacos Bell’s bean burrito and a few of the delicious dishes, you should check out the Uncyclopedia article called Poop Cuisine.
I love eating poop so much that I am learning how to say “I eat poop” in every language in the world! This way I can travel the world telling the many different cultures and peoples of the world about my joy of eating poop. When I tell the people of this I expect that natives will generously give me samples of poop in their ethnic style. Poop is so inexpensive, it is the least these communities can do for a poop lover like me. It is a great phenomenon and wonder of the world why such a delicious ingredient to the world’s finest foods is so inexpensive. But oh well, no time to ponder such a deep question, who cares!, it benefits me, so lets eat!

Here is my list of “I eat poop” in different languages.

I eat poop – English
Wo chi shi - mandarin
Como mierda - spanish
Ya yem gavno - russian
Je mange de la merde - french
Ich esse scheisse - german
Con an cuc (k-ong an cook) Namian
Watashiwa pupuo tatemas/unko tabeta - japanese
Co como merda – Portuguese
Eu Ma`na`nc ca`cat – Romanian
Ka noy ken key – Laotian
Saya makan tai – Indonesian
Ami hag u khai – bangali
Na nen tong-eul muk nen-da – Korean
Ngor sek si – Cantonese
Saya makan berak – malay = indonesian?
Ku Kin Khee Thai
tro to epistevo Greek
ku'o kai te' Tongan
kuv nyob koua Hmong

Please comment and tell me how to say it in more languages or correct what is seen here.